by Linda King

Remember our issues are on a personality level. We are spiritual beings, all connected and part of the one heart. If we feel stuck we just come back to the heart, get in the elevator and look at things from a higher perspective. Love is the most important thing when we come from the heart, the high heart. Be prepared to find that within self even when that is the last thing we feel we can do. Wanting to contract or stay the same size is not coming from a heart space.

Communication is the basis of all relationships and is a two-way road. We allow others to speak and we listen. We acknowledge the reality of others and we don’t judge them. Ideal communication is with an open heart.

To have successful relationships we need to feel and acknowledge everything. We need to feel our resistance, conflict, confusion, pain, hurt, defense, irritation, insecurities, being misunderstood, victimized and separation from other or source or self. We need to feel the way our relationships are, if they work or don’t work, how we’d like them to be, how they are, or how they are not. Are we prepared to expand self and reach over our comfort zone and be vulnerable with other, to have compassion and understanding, to extend self? Are we prepared to deepen our understanding of self and other by experiencing the reality of other? We need to allow vulnerability to become strength and feel strength and courage expressing and reaching out to others.

We need to acknowledge the patterns we play. Who do we behave like? Whose patterns are we running? Who did we pick them up from? Once we realise we are running the pattern of another we have the power to change it.  We are not victims to any of our programming or patterning.

Be aware of your attachments, expectations and needs (when you are the needy one). Be aware of the roles you play to fill needs and be aware of the roles that others play to fulfil your needs. For example, those times you allow yourself to be manipulated or you try to manipulate someone to fulfil some role.

We have the power to allow others energy to effect us or not. We have a choice to take any words to heart, to push our buttons, to respond in defense, attack, justification and to be right or not. We can choose not to attack others with our energy and we can set up an intention and process to effectively deal with that energy. We can control our lower aspects and we don’t need to lash out.

Every time we don’t deal with it, it will be presented again. We know what our weaknesses are, what our buttons are and that the universe loves and supports us so much that it will be presented until we learn.

Acknowledge any reactions. It might be appropriate to verbalize that you are having a reaction and you need to go and dialogue and you will meet back in half an hour when you are clearer. You may need to make a mental note to dialogue, transmute it, or explore it further at a more convenient time.

Ensure your feet are on the ground and you pay attention to your connection to source, remain attuned to the truth, allow yourself to be as you feel, acknowledge how you feel, be grateful for how you feel, release the judgment of how you feel, choose to accept yourself as you are and release anything which no longer serves who you are or who you are becoming - feel into the new and go forth and be it.

Clear the throat chakra so you can speak clearly, truthfully and be open to intuition and inspiration.

Clear the heart chakra to fill self with love and share that love with others.

Clear the solar plexus chakra to purify the lower, selfish, separate, self.

Clear the sacral to cleanse and cut as many inappropriate bonds, ties, links, cords and connections as we can to everyone and all things.

Clear the base chakra so we can feel safe being here and be fully present here and now.

     Ask your mentor for assistance.

For example: “Ok mentor, I have a pointed view to guide my evolutionary steps. I know I’ve got buttons. I know people push them. If I am in avoidance, denial or if any of my buttons are being pushed and I am pretending it is “them” and not me, can you give me a tap on the shoulder?  Can you please whisper in my ear, give me a nudge or somehow bring it to my attention?  I really want to know. I am working on mastery. If you are there with me in a space of clarity and if I miss something, I give you permission to bring it into my awareness. Then I will accept responsibility and I will take appropriate action.”

AFFIRMATIONS

“I accept my reality as created by me in co-creation with other.. I choose not to project my reality onto another."

"I accept myself as I am here and now"

“I choose to grow. In my intention to grow I  accept the truth so I can allow all that needs to be felt, integrated, transmuted and released."

“In my relationship I will use every moment as an opportunity  to be open to self, to be in touch with self and to love and understand self and other.”

“I am absolutely loved, supported and nurtured. I am never lost, separated or isolated… except in my thoughts.”

“Any time my partner, or anyone, triggers me and I feel insecure, unsupported or unloved I know it isn’t true.”