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Healthy Connections

By Linda King

Communicating, relationships, sharing, attachments, expectations, reactions and all of that allow us to feel more into our “stuff”. We are responsible for our energy and every little reaction is ours to bring into balance

Let's prepare by having both of our feet flat on the floor and feel the energy moving down both our legs, through our feet, deep into the earth and returning. Let's breathe and deepen that connection. We feel energy flowing from our heart to the heart of the earth and returning. We are in a space of flow. Let's give ourselves permission to be here. Let's affirm our protection and feel safe within that feeling, safe we are able to really feel. That is what we will be doing.

Now let's pay attention to any feelings of resistance, defense, justifications, and sense of being in or out of control, feeling those feelings when we don’t get our own way and whatever else gets stirred. Through communication, sharing, openness, truth, we can give ourselves permission to feel more truth within ourselves and to be open to the truth.

“I want to grow. In my intention to grow I need to accept the truth so I can allow that which needs to be felt, integrated, transmuted and released. I need to accept the truth so I know what my mind is doing and what reality I am creating.”

We feel our insecurities, being misunderstood, victimized and in separation from other or source or self. We are aware of how we feel about our relationships, about the way they are, they work or don’t work, how we’d like them to be, how they are, or how they are not. Are we prepared to expand self and reach over our safety zone, our comfort zone, and be vulnerable with other, to have compassion and understanding, to extend self, and deepen our understanding of both self and other by experiencing the reality of other?

“I will work and use this moment as an opportunity to be open to you, by being open to self, for being in touch with self and by loving you, and wanting to understand you.”

Once we realise we are running the pattern of another we have the power to change it. We are not victims to any of our programming or patterning. They are gifts to show us how we are and how we can be. Integrated within self, body mind and spirit and integrate the humanness within our relationships and remembering that humanness. Sometimes a touch or a hug is necessary.

“ I’m going through stuff, you’re going through stuff, how about we just have a hug and affirm our love for each other and reconnect in a nice, open way? Let’s remember that connection and why we got together. Let’s remember the connection that keeps us together and brings us back to that space. Although we are scared we want to be and feel more love.”

Allow vulnerability to become strength and feel strength and courage expressing and reaching out to another.

Remember that our issues are on a personality level, that we are spiritual beings. Remembering we are all connected and part of the one heart. If we feel stuck, we can come back to the heart, and look at things from a higher perspective. That will help us be in a heart space of two spiritual beings having a loving connection and being prepared to get out of each other’s way to share love and to assist each other to work through any stuff.

“ I don’t have enough for me, I don’t feel I can expand that and encompass you in my heart that is so battered and broken.”

But we can, because as we expand we encompass our entire self and then we keep going and gently reach out and gently touch the heart of other and they reach out and connect with us. That is the middle ground. When we feel into our hearts we know they want to expand. So that is a clue. Be prepared to give that which you haven’t given before, be prepared to move to the depths of your vulnerability and recognize any thoughts or feelings that are blocking that.

Let's see ourselves as a child in one moment that really had an impact on the way we now see ourselves and the way we relate, and feel that. See that child shrinking to become really small, to the size of your thumb. See them standing on the palm of your hand. Look them in the eyes and confirm your love and commitment to nurture, love, support, encourage and assist in their growth. Take that small being and place them in your heart. The sensation will be something like when planting a seed and how you feel when the seed goes into the soil and the soil lovingly wraps around the seed protecting, nurturing and providing everything that is necessary for its growth.

Let’s do the same thing within our own heart and acknowledge any resistance. Let’s trust that the energies will be there to assist us. Be open and accept that part of self. Just as the soil wraps around the seed, the heart wraps around this small being radiating love. Feel that. Allow yourself to feel how it feels to be so safe and secure. Just as we need a little down pouring of rain for the seed we need light for the heart and growth begins. The relationship has begun. Any time our partner, or anyone, triggers us and we feel insecure, unsupported or unloved, feel and know it isn’t true.

“We are absolutely loved, supported, nurtured. We are never lost, separated or isolated… except in our thoughts.”

Let’s feel the nurturing, supporting, loving energy all around us, above, below, within, without, left, right, before and behind us. Let’s choose to remember every person that we meet is not the enemy, not an old partner, not anyone that used to respond in a way that wasn’t in unconditional love and support. While communicating remember how it felt for us. We can stay like that and the communication can be stuck or we can see the other person in the same heart space as us. We are in there together; there is no separation, it is like twins sharing the same space. We have the same reality, we have an affinity of love we can open our hearts and speak the truth and communicate.

Let’s remember in moments of conflict, confusion, pain, hurt and resistance to center, align, breathe and be open. Ask, “Am I prepared to give of self, to self, and others and in this moment do I need to listen?

“Relationships are about giving and receiving. We can’t just be the giver or receiver. We need to work a balance.”

Let’s breathe with our hearts and remember each day to share that love with the small being planted within our heart. Let’s talk, listen, respond and care with them. Practice having a healthy relationship within. This small being may have some things to say that could sometimes be difficult to hear. It may have felt abandoned, rejected or unloved by you. It is your role to be taking care of this being, so if there is an issue of trust or non-trust you need to heal that.

Let’s breathe, connect, be open to the truth, set firm loving boundaries, be open to giving and receiving and bring our self here and now. It is the only place and time that there is. Be aware of what your energy is doing when you relate with others. Are you contracting and withdrawing? Let’s do whatever we need to do. Let’s be prepared to have compassion for others and to listen.

©The Insight Foundation
Linda King is the Co-Founder of the Insight Foundation and
Head of Faculty for the Insight Foundation’s Cosmosis™
Academy
http://.theinsightfoundation.org.au
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